The Ball

“The Governor’s Ball”…What an elegant sound. I mentioned last week that I was going to attend this year’s Washington State Governor’s Inaugural Ball. It was pretty cool. It reminds me of the AC/DC song Big Balls (who’s got the biggest balls of them all).

I happened to be in Olympia for a training so I bought a ticket, even though I’m not into politics, frankly I can never remember what team she plays on since I’m on the fence when it comes to political parties.

But here’s the rundown: I was all decked out in a formal, a slinky shawl and my little black vintage purse. Also, I had my Escada party shoes on that I bought in Vegas at Ceasar’s Palace and lots of bling to match! I had even gotten my hair done earlier in the day.

The hairdo is a story in itself. I drove around for 30 minutes, went to six salons and they were all booked, finally went to one and they were all Korean. I asked if someone could do an up-do and the lady asked me in broken English if I wanted my eyebrows waxed. I said no and she gave me a really funny look. I was like, what, so I have full brows, it’s not like they are that bad. So this little gal starts curling my hair, then they are talking in Korean and I swear I thought they were telling the gal to give me some super crazy do that I wouldn’t have a choice but to go with it. But it turned out really cute, all those big curls and then she pulled some up. Since my dress went down a ways in the back I needed to leave part of my hair down to cover up my tattoo. Not that I cared, but I didn’t think the Gov would say, hey, nice tat.

So off to the gala ball! I ended up meeting up with some folks from my town so I didn’t have to go by myself. We wandered around the capital building, and then found the food and beverage tents. It was an open beer & wine bar, which turned out to be not a good thing for me. There was so much food, all done by culinary schools from across the state. The students would explain what some of them were and I realized that watching Top Chef does have real value.

They had the offices open in the Capitol – I even got my picture taken sitting at the State Treasurer’s desk. Then they had the ceremony and a receiving line, which I was right by the front so got to meet the Gov with hardly any waiting. There were so many people there it was hard to meet any cute guys, but I sure did see a lot of them!

We went back to the hotel bar and had a couple of more drinks. I stayed up way too late and had to go to class hungover, tired and then drive back home that way too.

All in all, it was a once in a lifetime experience and I would definitely do it again but try not to enjoy so much of the free wine.

Touching Base

Hi friends…I know I’ve been remiss in posting, and you also know that excuses are like a$$holes, everyone’s got one. So, even though I don’t like to make excuses, I’ve got a couple. Frankly I got burnt out and have been busy, work has been really stressful and I still have Christmas presents I haven’t wrapped yet.

I know, it’s pathetic, but due to inclement weather, I haven’t seen my mom and stepdad so I still have their presents. I survived the holidays and am trying to refuel mentally to continue entertaining my pals.

So here’s a look of things to come:

• Raunchy girl dinner talk;
• Seeing an old flame;
• Dating someone new;
• Meeting up with some old pals; AND
• I’m going to the Washington State 2009 Governor’s Inaugural Ball on Wednesday.

What you say, Governor’s Ball? I feel like Cinderella. I’m not even political, but I’ll be in the same town for a training and am going. There’s got to be some singles there, I’m banking on it! Mama’s breaking out the Escada shoes, little black dress and lots of bling. Look for me in the socialite pages. Since it’s technically a Democratic event, do you think I should try and look like Sarah Palin? I’m thinking I’ll go with the contacts for this one.

Blast from the Past

Boy I don’t know what the new change-o-year has to do with blasts from the pasts is, but this is something. And it happens to coincide with an actual date of a real life decent guy.

I know I haven’t updated for a while, but chalk it up to being busy, single and facebook. Sorry but Facebook is where it’s at now. MySpace is out.

So I know there’s a lot to chat about since I had a couple of dates (with the same guy even). More later on the new guy.

Get this, I’ve had three recent blasts from the past.

1. One of my guy pals that I went from 1st grade on through school got in touch via classmates.com.;

2. My high school crush now wants to be my friend on facebook. Hey, dude, you should have went out with me then. Sorry, but I saw you at out ten year reunion and I looked way better than you did.

3. And then after a Broadway production of Movin Out (which rocked), I ran into the ONE GUY that I could have gone pretty much the rest of my life without wanting to see again. This is one of those guys that messes with your head and is bad news. Let’s just say we have history.  Turns out he’s now working at the new Yakima hot spot. Great…now I have to avoid that shit too. I so should have moved out of state…those damn nephews of mine have made it virtually impossible for me to leave.

I wonder if all these past connections are some sort of test – you know to maybe make me appreciate the new guy that I’m dating?

What’s your 20?

Do you ever remember the old cop shows when they’re on the radio and the dispatcher says ‘what’s your twenty’? Meaning, what’s your location? I used to date a cop so was used to hearing that all the time.

Well, I learned a new phrase today. 420 friendly. I’d never heard this one before but was reading the Craig’s List personals and saw this expression, with a description about getting together, hooking up and having a smoke. OK, I wasn’t born yesterday, so figure 420 must be like the police code for busting someone with pot.

I was wrong, but in the right neighborhood. Thanks to Google, 420 friendly is for people who are into smoking pot, or don’t mind if people get high. Well I guess you might as well get it out of the way, no point of wasting any time. They could say ‘cheech seeking chong’ and it would probably mean the same thing.

The interesting thing is, what if someone was advertising for a little NSA 420 hook up and an undercover cop showed up? I suppose they couldn’t bust you for the sex part, but for they could for possession.

You know, I just learn something new every day, it never ceases to amazes me what people come up with.

Money can’t buy rhythm

You know how sometimes you think money can buy everything? It can buy love, stuff, fun, nice clothes friends – not the kind of love or friends that I think I want, but some people are into that. I know this one gal that says you should marry the first time for money and the second for love. I’m not sure about that philosophy, but I’d like both the next time around.

News flash, money can’t buy rhythm. One of my service clubs had our big Christmas program today – this group is huge, we’re talking 300+ members – so the events are a pretty big deal. I’m not in with the ‘popular’ crowd, so usually just keep a low profile.

So there’s this totally rich gal in town, we’re talking the who’s who. She’s got the house on the one street that all the wealthy people live and the whole lifestyles of the rich & famous house.

Part of the program was a band and choir (made up of members), which was actually impressive. BUT, for all the $$ this lady’s got, she could not move to the beat. I mean it was like watching a middle schooler do the side -to -side shuffle, kind of like step aerobics without the step. This was before the days that kids ‘grind’ or whatever they call it.

So for all of my broke-ness right now, I’ve at least got some dance moves. I might not have a lot of cashola, but I can shake my booty when its called for. Not like when I do the ‘Elaine’ dance, which seems to entertain a lot of folks, but I had to stop doing it because I think people thought I actually danced like that.

New Chain Letter

To all my friends who send me best ‘wishes’, chain letters, ‘angel’ letters or other promises of good luck.

NONE OF THAT SHIT IS WORKING!

Could you please just send:

Money, Alcohol, Hot Guys or Gasoline Vouchers?

Thank You.

Call in Gay Day

Have you seen this latest grass-roots effort to protest against California’s decision to repeal the legitimacy of the proposition in favor of gay marriage? Today is an unofficial ‘call in gay day’, kind of the reverse of a sit-in, more like a sit-out.

It’s where they are trying to make a statement that if everyone that was gay didn’t spend any money the economy would suffer, or to show how vital gay and lesbians are to commerce and business, basically to make people think about it what the world would be like without the gay and lesbian community. So not to stereotype, but I would imagine that San Francisco was pretty quiet today.

I really don’t have much of an opinion on this one. I’ve got a lot of gay and lesbian friends and don’t care if they get married or not, I say why shouldn’t they suffer through a divorce as much as the rest of us?

The whole funny thought of mine today was, what if there was some super macho hetero-homophobic guy that got food poisoning or the flu and had to call in sick today? Wouldn’t that be hilarious – then he goes back to work tomorrow and is like, hey I was really sick. Yeah, right buddy, hey it’s OK if you’re a closet homosexual, whatever floats your boat…

Social Media Overload

I finally broke down and joined Facebook – it’s pretty cool, but now I’m totally overloaded with all this social media stuff. I’m trying to keep up my blog, Facebook, my Blackberry, text messaging, a work website, then all this other crap – LinkedIn, Classmates.Com, Alumni information, not to mention all these passwords and store membership numbers. I rented some movies the other night and couldn’t remember my phone number (I use my old disconnected number for a lot of things, just so I don’t get any calls).

I can’t believe I’m even considering getting an I-Pod for my Christmas-to-self present. Sometimes I really wish I had a teenager. On second thought, maybe I can borrow one to show me how to download some I-tunes.

Do the ChaCha

I just found out about a super cool thing. Remember ‘Ask Jeeves’, and now ‘Ask.com’, where you can email a question and then get an answer? Well now in this new mobile world there’s ChaCha. This is a free mobile answer service that you can call or text a question to and it will text you an answer back within minutes. So if you really can’t wait to get to a computer, you can call or text and get instantaneous results! This is perfect for people that either need instant gratification or have ADHD. Text ChaCha (242242) or call (1.800.2ChaCha).

For example, I’m out last night at a Tav with some girlfriends. One of them had a date with a guy who is a Libra – she’s like, what are the characteristics of a Libra? We didn’t know for sure, so she’s like, let’s ask ChaCha – sure enough within a few minutes we had the answer. Way cool!

The only downside is that you’d better have your trivia facts straight because you can totally get called out if someone doesn’t believe what you say.

Driving School

Real stories from the local paper. I swear, you cannot make this shit up.

The first story: This guy falls asleep while driving, car flips on the freeway, totaled. Luckily the driver and passenger are OK. Investigators said the driver crashed after falling asleep. He was expected to receive a ticket for driving with his wheels off the roadway. They really have a ticket for that? Talk about adding insult to injury, I mean he totals his car and then gets a ticket on top of it.

Genius #2: This other guy driving a Hummer gets rescued after driving his rig down a boat ramp and barely makes it out alive. He admitted after his Hummer was towed out that he’d had about six beers. (Does that count as a couple beers?)

Apparently he decides to do the Hummer Water Limbo and starts driving down a boat ramp into the water. How low can you go??? He gets to the point where all his passengers bail out, the rig gets stuck and by the time he’s rescued his head is barely above water. He later tells the officers that he was testing out his new tires. Hey, let’s see how far this baby will go down in the water, hell they use these for freaking combat missions, I’ll bet we could cross the river if we try. You guys in? Let’s do it.

There’s a lesson in what not to do while driving. Too funny.